Roast jokes dating the boss
" I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, Ill be looking for the remote, but I wont remember that its on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first Ill water the flowers.
As they crossed the bridge, they lost their grip on the donkey, the donkey fell into the river and drowned.
But let’s take a completely different side of this…
_______________________________________________ A man was pulled over for driving too fast, even though he thought he was driving just fine. However, the cockroach wasn't able to walk with only one leg. After they were done, his sister-in-law allowed Johnny to put the icing on. Lawyers should never ask a Mississippi Grandma a question if they aren’t prepared for the answer. You think you’re a big shot when you haven’t the brains to realize you’ll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, “Mrs. The father assures the son that granddaddy is fine and sends him to bed. One week later, the man again goes into his son's room to wish him goodnight.
For the third experiment, they cut off yet another leg from the cockroach and once more they told the cockroach to walk. As he arrived at their house he found his young nephew, Little Johnny, helping them bake some cupcakes. After a while my tongue got tired, and I got the dog to help.” ________________________________________________ Never ask a grandma if she know you. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. In a very quiet and low voice he said, “If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I’ll send you both to the electric chair.” ________________________________________________ The Old Man Humor I saw an old man sitting on a park bench. The son this time says that he had dreamt that granddaddy had died.
The woman walked up to the examiner and said, "I've answered this question in all four ways, the wall, the cliff, the young man, the old man. The boy and the man figured they were probably right, so they decide to carry the donkey.
At the end of the day: the car isnt washed, the bills arent paid, there is a warm can of Pepsi sitting on the counter, the flowers dont have enough water, there is still only one cheque in my cheque book, I cant find the remote, I cant find my glasses, and I dont remember what I did with the car keys.